If you'll join us in this song, I think you'll recognize it when I start.
Let me get a chord

1 2 3 4

(Always remember, others may hate you. Those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself.)

Richard Nixon died today. (That's just plain poppycock. And then you destroy yourself.)
I saw it on the news they said. (Au revoir. Au revoir. We'll see you again.)
Oh, I guess he was okay (I am not a crook)
He was the president everybody hated (because people have got to know if their president's a crook! Their president's a crook, but I am not a crook. Crook! Crook!)
And I don't dream about the president anymore (Crook, crook! As a flower, she grew.)
And all of my friends they say they don't either (Crook, crook! And as a fair young flower, she died.)

Richard Nixon died today. (Poppycock.)
I saw it on the news they said. (Because people have got to know)
Oh, I guess he was okay (Their president's a crook)
I'm watching history remake (Crook, crook)
He went to a special place in Heaven (I have never obstructed justice)
Called Yorba Linda (We don't have a good word for it in English. Poppycock.)
And I don't dream about the president anymore (Crook, crook! As a flower, she grew.)
And most of my friends they say they don't either (Crook, crook! And as a fair young flower, she died.)

Richard Nixon died today. (That's just plain poppycock. We'll see you again.)
RIchard Nixon died today. (We'll see you again. We'll see you again. We'll see you again. We'll see you again. Au revoir.)

I wish that I could kiss your ass, the pants you wore
I wish that you were more than a brother to me
The moss, the ferns, the cedar trees

Like a raven and a crow
Fighting over a pinecone
Lying on the grass
I wish that I could kiss your ass

I wish that I could kiss your ass, the pants you wore
I wish that you were more than a dummy to me
With stitching, stuffing, plastic feet

Like a raven and a crow
Fighting over a pinecone
Lying on the grass
I wish that I could kiss your ass

I wish that I was styrofoam
The packing pellets sent from home
I wish a boulder on a hill
would crush the bell inside your bill

I wish someone would send a bomb to every advertising executive's home
I know there's a lot in New York and LA
The bombs would go off on Christmas day

Like a raven and a crow
Fighting over a pinecone
Lying on the grass
I wish that I could kiss your ass

Your hips and your lips and the way that you laugh
Your very great height just like a giraffe
Your straight brown hair so recently cut
Your yellow duck feet the size of your butt
Your extra sharp pencils, the way that you see
The things that you draw and the way you like me

The reasons you have for leaving New York
The food that you make that I eat with my fork
The car that you fixed when the 8 track was broke
The Dunhill cigarettes you occasionally smoke
All of these things that come into my mind
When I think about you which is a lot of the time

Oh, I miss you, my darling, when I'm eating my toast
And I know that you love me and I love you the most
And I'll meet you in Tuscon when the weather is hot
I'll ask you to marry me but I know probably not
But I like you and love you much more than you know
And I'll see you again, my dear, underneath three feet of snow
Oh, I miss you, my darling, when I'm eating my toast
And I know that you love me and I love you the most

Hi.
> You know, I listen to your show.
Oh, here comes a critique, I can always tell when they're coming.
> It's not a critique, I just, I just want to say something.
Yes?
> I listen to your show almost every day, I listen to it for the intelligent debate
Here it comes, it's a critique, you're gonna say what it is
> All kinds of issues
You're gonna critique the program now
> No!
Of course you are. You're going to tell me that you don't like it
> I'm asking you why we are wasting time talking about this.
Because I talk about the issues of the week.
> Who cares?
This is the top story on, on ABC radio network news, it's the top story on television, and that's what we talk about, Nancy.
> I understand,
If you don't think it's an important issue, you probably are out of our demographic, because this is an issue that people in America really care about.
> Why?

I found myself in a bathing suit sitting on the edge of a swimming hole
The swimming hole was filled with dark black water
From the edge of the water I could see a huge electric power plant
with pipes and wires towering over my head from hundreds of feet

Everywhere there was humming coming out of the transformers, more than
fifty feet tall, and right in the middle of this power plant there was a basketball

The basketball was surrounded by a chainlink fence at least 40 feet high
There was a small man - only four feet tall - and he was bouncing a basketball
of unusual size and weight, it was over three feet in diameter
considerably heavier than your average basketball

Everywhere there was humming coming out of the transformers, more than
fifty feet tall, and right in the middle of this power plant there was a basketball

Everywhere there was humming coming out of the transformers, more than
fifty feet tall, and right in the middle of this power plant there was a basketball

Two light bulbs flickering
Next to my ear
Buzzing and chattering
Thought I could hear
them say "my little Skook"
"my little Chuck"
"my darling dearest Tim"
"truck, truck, truck"

Some words were spoken
Some part of a cow
Bits of intestine
in the stomach right now
Can't wake up my mind
as I slowly start to sink
Look at my feet stuck in the mud
and I think

Two light bulbs flickering
Next to my ear
Buzzing and chattering
Thought I could hear
them say "my little Skook"
"my little Chuck"
"my darling dearest Tim"
"truck, truck, truck"

Milk. Milk.

1 2 3 4 1 2

Would you like some cold truck milk? Anybody?
Telling you that milk (milk.) comes in trucks is like telling you (everybody)
that milk comes from cows (everybody needs milk.)
You knew it all the time (you would think we were doing a milk commercial.)

Telling you that milk (you know what that makes?) comes in trucks is like telling you (everybody)
that milk comes from cows (everybody needs milk.)
You knew it all the time (you know what that makes me want an ice cold milk,)

What you may not realize (anybody?)
all America's milk supply (you got any milk?)
moves to you by truck (anybody?)
By truck by truck by truck (everybody needs milk)

Nearly everything else (needs milk) that you eat (needs milk) drink, use or wear (do you have any ice cold milk?)
came all or the way or part of the way to you (needs milk) by truck (that sounds like an ad for milk doesn't it?)
By truck by truck by truck by truck by truck by truck by truck (you know what, I think it is)
But next time that you see a cow (milk) remember it is waiting for a truck (oh, why did you paint that image of me?)

Flower bun bun bun flower bun bun. Flower bun bun bun bun bun.

down the stairs, he's in your hair. everywhere is jack pastrami.
things inside your fridgadeer. standing out in the cold dry air.
he's everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere is jack pastrami.
he's everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere is jack pastrami.

Land of the bold captains, map to new (well you got trouble, trouble)
Land of the bold captains, map to new (you got trouble my friend)

i think some folks don't really know, making room for jack pastrami
in the blizzard, in the snow. filling in for jack pastrami
he's everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere is jack pastrami.
he's everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere is jack pastrami.

Land of the bold captains, map to new (well you got trouble, trouble)
Land of the bold captains, map to new (you got trouble my friend)

how would your life be tried over again and the stop as we die as we drive to the vet
in the pouring rain drunk ???? spine
i saw jack, oh jack pastrami, i don't think the he saw me
everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere there is jack pastrami.
he's everywhere. he's everywhere. everywhere is jack pastrami.

Land of the bold captains, map to new

My head is humming, my wheels are buzzing
I'm out from under you

My teeth are clicking, I'm liking licking
I'm out from under you

Influential you, don't like the things you make me do
You untucked my shirt and you burnt all my ties

Influential you, don't like the things you make me do
My head went crazy when I told you lies.

I live here because I was born here. I don't know, I have always lived here, because I was born here.
I don't live here because I was born here. I don't know, I have always lived here

Now I like my with a pecan nut
Tastes so much darn better than that old Pizza Hut

Some may call me nothin but a Waffle House hick
but if I didn't have that franchise I would be sick.

Influential you, don't like the things you make me do
You untucked my shirt and you burnt all my ties

Influential you, don't like the things you make me do
My head went crazy when I told you lies.

Some made it to Alaska.
Some to Timbuktu.
Who made the greatest trip of all?
Why, Virginia, it was you.
You set off ? but you landed on your face
I rushed to help you when you fell
I thought oh heck,
now what shall I do?

Virginia to Alaska
She made it to Timbuktu

You grabbed the table when you fell
?
If you keep this pace up, Virginia dear,
You won't last it through the year
So take care, I do implore
And you'll be around at 94

Some made it to Alaska.
Some to Timbuktu.
Who made the greatest trip of all?
Virginia's Trip.
Why, Virginia, it was you.
Virginia's Trip.
You set off ? but you landed on your face
I rushed to help you when you fell
I thought oh heck,
now what shall I do?
You grabbed a table when you fell
???

Virginia to Alaska
She made it to Timbuktu

If you keep this pace up, Virginia dear,
you won't last it through the year
so take care I do implore
Virginia's Trip
and you'll still be around in 94
Virginia's Trip
Virginia's Trip

You come into the room
You find you are too huge
You sense there's not much air
You sit down in your wooden chair

There's things that they'll want to tell you
but somehow they just can't
The world is like a big fat man
about to split his pants

You eat a char-broiled steak
You find a mouth to break
You think you have it all
You realize your hand is so small

There's things that they'll want to tell you
but somehow they just can't
The world is like a big fat man
about to split his pants

There's things that they'll want to tell you
but somehow they just can't
The world is like a big fat man
about to split his pants
(pants. pants pants panTS PANTS pants ad inf)

Within a month / Shining. Patchy
(starting to grow)

Within a month, lo and behold, a miracle had occurred!
Within a month, within a month

The sky is low, the ground is high
They meet together in the sky
Dirt in the clouds, clouds in the ground
Pork in the store sold by the pound

I lie awake at night
And poke my finger in my eye

The sky is low, the ground is high
They meet together in the sky
Dirt in the clouds, clouds in the ground
Pork in the store sold by the pound

What do real estate agents
do when they're alone?

Within a month, lo and behold, a miracle had occurred!
Shining new hair had started to grow on his patchy bald areas
And his itching and scratching decreased significantly
Within a month, within a month

The sky is low, the ground is high
They meet together in the sky
Dirt in the clouds, clouds in the ground
Pork in the store sold by the pound

They pretend they're selling houses
Closing deals on cellular phones

[instrumental]

Feelin kind of grumpy, are you in a bad mood?
Got an upset stomach, think you ate some bad food?

You might not recognize me, my hair is receding
Like a snake whose bloated body has just eaten a deer

I wonder if there's a way to cheer you up when you're (fifteenth or up?????????)

I remember when I met you, you were wearing my favorite shirt!
You were playing my favorite record by the Tijuana Brass and Herb Alpert.

? put a potato on my head
Let me take a whack at it

(ouch I bit my tongue. Ow!)

? put a potato on my head
Let me take a whack at my head

You sell more pairs of slacks than anyone I know
You step on tiny sharp thumbtacks and have a bleeding toe

found among the seashore, wiggling in the sand
There was a severed penis and a decomposing hand

I wonder if there's a way to cheer you up when you're (fifteenth or up?????????)

You might not recognize me, my hair is receding
Like an ice cube melting in a sink of steel

Feelin kind of grumpy, are you in a bad mood?
Got an upset stomach, think you ate some bad food?

(Feel the light. In this holy body. Filling. Filling. The vagina.)

Your skin is gelatin. (Gently.)
Your face is a cream. (Gently.)
An empty bowl of cereal (gently allowing the light)
On a rock in a stream (of your mercy, to fill the vagina. Let the vagina fill with light.)

If you can't cry (it's moist)
Try ammonia and glycerin (? cradle)
Try a blobby little jellyfish floating on the bottom of white paint filling up a cast iron bucket (of life. Of love. Of healing.)

(Touching so tenderly the subtle wrinkles, the subtle muscles of the vagina.)

Your skin is gelatin. (Gently.)
Your face is a cream. (Gently.)
An empty bowl of cereal (gently allowing the light)
On a rock in a stream (of your mercy, to fill the vagina. Let the vagina fill with light.)

Pebbles, rocks, and sand
covered in a slime beneath my feet (so tenderly)
An empty bowl of cereal (the vagina)
Sugar in the middle and a little cracked wheat

(A soft glow brightening moment to moment with each sensation received there.)

Your skin is gelatin. (Gently.)
Your coffee is a cream. Oops (The healing)
An empty bowl of cereal (melting away)
On a rock in a stream (the vagina.)
(Let the vagina fill with light.)

[instrumental]

Okay. Got the guitar capo'd up-
Okay-

Oh.

Hey, I'm -
No -
That did, it's okay, shit. Okay, it was on voice actuation. Got the guitar capo'd up one fret. Rancho Pancho.

I wanna wind up on the rancho
So I can sit down with my Pancho

Oh where oh where did Pancho go?
I'm looking high and looking low
Where is that man? I love him so.

I sigh and I cry for my Lothario
He's such a gay caballero
As we rode together among the street car was strong
My Spanish was weak
So we just listened to Totem Creek

Oh Rancho Pancho that's all I dreaming of
Rancho Pancho, I can't find the man I love
He knows, he knows?, my little niño
Why oh why did pancho go?

You're my pal.
I love you.
You're my favorite best friend
Hug me tight
Play with me